Does Having Sons Age You?

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Most of the content for parents of sons on social media seems to be very negative, especially the content for “boy moms.” As a mother to two boys myself, I find some of this content sweet and relatable, but a lot of it is, frankly, obnoxious and verging on toxic. Recently I have seen posts circulating on social media claiming that boy moms don’t live as long and age faster than girl moms. My initial response to these posts was annoyance at yet another negative message being spread about being a parent to boys. However, when I dug into the research, I was surprised to find that there may be some truth to this claim— but it’s more complicated than you may think.

Main Research Findings

Research consistently finds that having sons is linked to a shorter lifespan and worse health in mothers. One study found that a mother’s risk of death per year increased by 7% for each son that they had (two sons would mean a 14% increase, 3 sons a 21% increase, etc.). A previous study conducted by the same authors found that, for every son a woman had, their lifespan decreased by 34 weeks while daughters were associated with a slightly increased lifespan (although this was not statistically significant). Interestingly fathers may not experience the same decrease in lifespan. Another study found that mothers reported worse health in old age with each son they had. Specifically, mothers had an 11% increased odds of reporting poor health in old age with each son that they had. Finally, a recent study found that parents of sons (both mothers and fathers) showed faster cognitive decline in old age.

Why Might This Be?

One theory that researchers have is that sons take more of a toll on a mother’s body (aka the expensive son hypothesis). The idea is that pregnancy, birth, and lactation of sons depletes maternal reserves more than daughters do and therefore the mother’s health may be negatively impacted. Supporting this idea, research finds that boys require more energy during pregnancy and lactation than girls. Research also finds that having sons may increase inflammation that contributes to degenerative diseases. In particular, research finds that having boys increases the risk for cardiovascular disease in mothers.

There may also be social factors at play, in addition to biological factors. For example, grandmothers are more